Who goes tonight? Well, I am hoping I know the answer. But first, here’s what happened before the eviction.
To indistinguishable shouts, Davina leads us to the highlights of yesterday. Apparently, it’s the housemates 50thday in the house. Lucky them. Lucky US. Rex licks his hand in the garden. Big Bro gives the housemates their happy packed lunches, as Dale tries to do the shopping list. Luke, obviously, is stirring with Lisa, trying to get her to aim for head of house next week. He says Rex has already stated he will keep the hell/heaven divide as it is. Lisa doesn’t like his moaning. Although I haven’t noticed that much of Rex’s moaning in the last few days. Darnell thinks he is going to be evicted. Bex and Luke, instead of talking about such important issues, instead discuss how they don’t fancy each other. Rex tells the diary room that he and Mo’s friendship is becoming distant.
Bex says she should wear a bin bag at her eviction. This needs no punning added. Mo wants a cigarette from Darnell. Darnell instead tells him to do something with his balls. Darnell becomes quite cross indeed. “Don’t push me, dude. I’m not playing with you,” he says, witha mouthful of what looks like coleslaw. He storms off. Kat looks confused, and sits frowning, with one arm sticking out. As Davina takes us to the break, I can hear the crowd. “Get Bex out!” they command, as we all hope for their request to be fulfilled.
Bex, dressed as some kind of grotesque Heidi, says she doesn’t care if people don’t like her. THAT’S LUCKY. Kat also thinks Bex doesn’t like her or Rachel (she’s right). However, Bex witters and pretends that this is not true. Dale has been told he needs to entertain the house, but, as he is prone to do, he has lied to the others and said that hell and heaven have to entertain, and that there will be a party. Bex gets her boobs out, as that is the only thing she knows how to do. Thoughtfully, Big Brother has covered this outbreak with the eviction number banners. Lisa comes out dressed possibly as Bex, with a blackened tooth. “What’s funny?” she asks. Lisa, Rachel and Kat scream at the cameras. Bex then gives Luke a resuscitation kiss in the bogs. THIS IS NOT ENTERTAINMENT. Luke wets himself. OK, he doesn’t. Now they are taking a vote of who is likely to win. “Who is the most hated housemate (outside)?” asks Luke, for his own gain, obviously. Mo, Rex and Bex score highly. “Bex will be hated a lot,” says Stu.
Oooh, the shopping has arrived. The prizes this week include a hell to heaven ticket, a paddling pool, and a fake dog poo. “Oh my god, I’m so excited,” says Sara, making her appearance for the day. Mo gets the hell-heaven ticket. Hooray. However, Sara has been given the ticket, and she has to wear a Hawaiian shirt and take a video. “I do look like an American tourist,” she says to Mikey, who, let’s not forget, is blind. “How do you think you can be more entertaining?” Big Brother asks Dale in the diary room. The answer? NOT AT ALL. He still has this peculiar obsession with getting nominated, which is only going to miserably backfire (as we all know, as soon as he’s up, he’ll be out).
And now it is the party. The housemates play some kind of drinking game with an orange. They are actually drinking raw egg as a punishment. Ugh, egg house. Mo doesn’t get the orange passed to him in time, and his punishment is to snog Mo. Punishment indeed. Luke is holding down his egg vomit. He goes and mills round the garden by himself. Mo knows Bex’s game, though. “She pulled Luke to survive,” he says. Bex feels bad, apparently. Luke wants a word with Mo. OH NOES! Bex goes outside and smokes, listening in. “Tonight has been really good,” she answers, oddly. Luke goes to the bedroom, and proclaims sickness. Outside, Mo tells Bex she only did it to make Luke jealous. Hms. In the main house, they are throwing eggs. Dale breaks one in Lisa’s hair. There is something very spiteful in this gesture, whether or not it’s in the rules of the ‘game’. Now Luke is sad in the bedroom with Bex. “It bothered me, Rebecca,” he says. “It’s not as if we’re together… I’m just disappointed,” he says. “You’re drunk, as well,” he says, possibly hoping for another hand manoeuvre in the dark. Now Luke admits that he likes Bex. UGH. I actually can’t look. “I actually like ya, and that’s not a lie,” she says to him. YOU’RE NOT SURVIVING, SO DON’T EVEN TRY IT.
AND SHE IS GONE. Night night!
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